KICK IT TO ME!

KICK IT TO ME!

KICK IT TO ME!

you bloody ripper!

I like to chat to strangers. You can usually find out strange and interesting things. You can also find out tidbits, pastimes, places you’ve been and people you have in common.

You have a random conversation and exchange a few emails and contacts. After a few weeks, you decide you should have a drink and meet.

The conversation extends into the evening and when you finally say fare thee well, you text each other on the way home to say what a great night and that you’re glad you randomly met.

A simple question can lead to great company, random nights, a shoulder to cry on, big belly laughs and shared passions that keep you talking, scheming and excited.

Live dangerously – people don’t bite and rejection is no big deal.

You may not remember the name of the person you called, but you’ll forever be glad you weren’t afraid to talk to strangers.

you bloody ripper!

Do you remember when slurpees hit the corner stores?

And what about when lolly bags cost $1 and were HUGE!

What about when you were a little waylaid on the way home because you had to squeeze in just one more game of Pac-Man after slurping your slurpee and chowing down on a full bag of bananas, milk bottles, fruit tingles, freckles and sherbert?

Or what about the sweet memories of  space invaders in the footpath while waiting for your battered fish, potato cakes and chiko rolls?

Move forward about 30 years and I may no longer chow down on potato cakes and chiko rolls, but I still don’t mind a freckle or five and I’m definitely one who gets waylaid far too easily.

Just one game.

I’ll be in trouble with my head tomorrow.

OK, just one more game.

I didn’t turn it that way – this thing is so greasy.

How could I resist the charms of Pac-Man’s artificial intelligence and the classic space invaders. Those bright, flickering lights and kaleidoscopic flashes of chomping aliens eating all in their way still manage to tempt even the most weariest working girl.

Pac-Man turns 30 year this year. He’s had a pretty impressive track history over the time including having a top 10 song with Pacman Fever reaching #9 in the Billboard Top 100 in 1982. The game showcased a revolutionary approach to programming, with each ghost having a different behaviour or personality so they react to Pacman differently. This is why the game is so damn challenging and why you just can’t help yourself staring at the screen and shoving the greasy handset for hours on end.

Who would have thought an ever hungry yellow blob could instill such a sense of determination, frustration and gratification in one hour of play.

Finger cramps. Blurry eyes. Greasy hands.

This is the last one!

Some things never change.

you bloody ripper!

I’ve felt it just for the sake of it. Then again, who hasn’t? I’m sure I’ve had a need that I wanted someone else to provide. When they did, I’m sure, I felt it. Actually, in that case, I’ve felt it more than once. There have been times when I couldn’t find anything more suitable, so I just used the label. I definitely know there have been times I just wanted to feel it, and did. Needless to say, I didn’t feel it for too long.

Love.

It’s a many splendoured thing. It’s an emotion that at times seems uncontrollable. Sometimes intense. Occasionally random. It has the power to carry us to the depths of despair and to elevate us to inconceivable heights. Is it the most powerful emotion that lives within us? Can we truly define it? Does its meaning change depending on our life, our experiences, our thoughts?

Is love about friendship? Does it only come to play when intimacy entwines itself within the emotion? Can we feel love equally towards our family, partner, children, friends and perhaps even our pets? Can it be one way or must it always be a reciprocal arrangement? And what about a love of life?

Is love about a life time commitment? Or can we truly experience it within the confines of a single night of reckless abandonment? Can fairytales still end with a happy ending?

Should we search for a Dummies Book on Love to find its true meaning and how to generate it in our lives? Is it not an evolutionary process that will change as we change, as others enter and leave our lives and as we travel on the high seas of life’s adventure?

I don’t have answers. I’m an observer. I’ve listened to the love songs of the century and daydreamed, cried, been moved and hoped. There’s certainly been a lot of expectancy when I’ve loved. I’ve spent thousands of dollars because I’ve loved someone. I’ve betrayed, because I loved. I’ve had a whole lot of fun, because I’ve loved. I’ve spent a whole lot of time living someone else’s dreams, because I loved. I lost myself, because I loved. I’ve had an introspective journey with myself in order to finally be able to say – I love me. Isn’t it funny how it’s always been easier to say it to somebody else?

I would really like to tell someone I love them. But I can’t – I’m not sleeping with them. Or can I?

Over the past 15 months I have learned to truly appreciate someone a little out of the ordinary – their intelligence, honesty, hope, intensity, thoughts, fragility. This person has blown some oxygen my way to help ignite my inner flame, without even aiming to, nor even understanding why. Perhaps it’s simply they never told me I should or shouldn’t do things, rather, they gave me the ability to figure things out for myself. They helped me find myself again.

This love is a little different from the past infatuations, dalliances, companionship and needs based relationships I’ve experienced. In fact, I’ve never felt this kind of love before.

Rather than an emotion, it’s about the unification of two individual journeys. Two people. Two stories. Two different places. It’s about discovering an individual and appreciating them simply for who they are. No expectations. No requirements. No hope we’ll ever make it between the sheets. No needs. Like travelling to a new city, this love is like exploring the hidden alleyways that are not written in a guide book but rather experienced, valued and captured as they are found. If I could photograph it and place it on my wall, it would take prime position.

Love.

It’s not just a four letter word. When sliding it off the tongue or radiating it from our bodies, share its meaning. Only then, will we understand its true value, capture its hidden secrets and not simply desire it, but allow it to embody the essence of our journey with ourselves and others.

Love.

It’s definitely a four letter portrait filled with colour, emotion, experience and special moments in time. Hang it high.

you bloody ripper!

I don’t have to be first across the line.

I simply have to give it a go.

But this was a tough game – five rounds of Raving Rabbids on the Wii against a seasoned 16 year old. The more I wanted to have control of those rabbids, the more I wanted to throw the control – always with total hilarity as I jumped, twisted, dodged and leapt with a piece of plastic in my hand. If life was only that easy to control.

Over a few hours (I’m not sure how many times I said just one more game) of travelling the world and eating carrots, talking on the phone, burping, playing to the beats, jumping over pontoons, making sure the boss didn’t catch me on the internet and selecting new outfits, I came out victorious.

The eyestrain and concern for a smashed tv and attack of hypertension was all worth it. It’s not so often I stare at the tv for hours on end, and by the end of it, have a curled smile across the face as I bask in the glowing moment of victory.

you bloody ripper!

It’s easy to go to the newsagent and buy a card.

All it takes is a short drive, a fiver, some quick words and a smiley face or big fat X at the bottom.

Effort = 5.

One can reduce the effort output by phoning, texting or sending a Facebook message.

One can increase the effort by driving further, buying a fancier card, writing on both sides or doubling the love at the bottom.

It must be noted that at all times thought = 10.

However, there comes a time when 10 + 10 = feels very special.

It’s glittery. It’s made from random scraps. There’s lots of colour. Nothing matches. There are no rhymes. There are few words.

It’s home made.

you bloody ripper!

Last night, I couldn’t sleep. For whatever reason I kept seeing the face of my great Vietnamese friend, Quan, through the wee hours of the morning.

I had learned of the tragic news Quan was killed in an accident on the Mekong. What made my visions so unsettling was that Quan’s death was in March 2009.

Quan had an incredibly warm spirit and energy, and was always providing a giving hand to anyone and everyone who needed help in his hometown of Ho Chi Minh. I remember fondly our drinks at Yoko, the card and palm readings he would organise on my regular visits, the milkshakes, cookies, advice on where to buy the best shoes and get one’s nails done… Quan was always there – as advisor, tour guide and friend. I always thanked him for everything he did. Did he really understand how much he was appreciated? Did I tell him enough?

A little down today, I hadn’t put my finger on why until I got home to write about today’s bloody ripper. And then I realised it was the reminder of Quan and the fact that life is finite.

Thinking about Quan provided me with a reminder to live life with passion and fill it with positive action. I also reflected on how we need to ensure our values are upheld, life’s goals are attained, and that, in all our actions, we are passionate and committed to our happiness. Importantly, it also reminded me to not lose sight of three things that should always be constant.

Firstly – change. During difficult times, we need to give ourselves the opportunity to look at ourselves and determine how we can change to get through them. Remember what a pool of stagnant water looks like? If you are starting to look a little green around the edges with fear of moving with the current times, perhaps it is time to take some time out. What needs to be reconsidered? How can we mend some bridges? How can we do things a little differently to ensure we have a work/life balance? Change is one of the few constants in our lives that is certain, and needed.

We also need to consider our own values – who we are and what we want from life. If we are aren’t heading in the right direction, perhaps it is time to change tack and give ourselves the chance to get out of rough waters. To reevaluate what is important and ensure that these values are aligned with our goals. Do you know what makes every DNA cell in your body dance?

And thirdly – make sure you show appreciation for those who encourage, inspire, support and are simply there. Pick up the phone. Write a letter. Give them a hug. Honour their memory. It is also important that you make sure you show appreciation for the small things in your life that even when darkness descends, bring light into a gloomy day. Show appreciation for all the you bloody rippers!

I believe that in all of us, there is an innate desire to give. But never forget yourself.

Live passionately!

I’m still waiting for the husband and two children seen by the card reader. She also told me I’d live a happy and fulfilled life – every time I saw her. That, I can control.

You are thought of Quan. Thank you for the inspiration! x

you bloody ripper!