Despite almost heralding in summer, Melbourne has been hit with its infamous seasonal whiplash. I’m not complaining. The rain and chilly weather have given me time to tuck myself away, sort out, clean out and work out.

I’m also feeling quite content that I’ve finally got my inbox down from 172 to 3, one of which I’m responding to openly via this post. I know Big Kev won’t mind. Because he knows I’ve listened.

Kev’s email was in response to a recent bloody ripper, ‘Making what you do matter’. His honest account of making decisions to not make a difference, to turn his back on a friend in her time of need and ‘pull back’ during his mother’s final days with cancer, was moving, thought provoking and hit me with a gentle nudge that could not have come at a better time.

“Sometimes we just can’t do it. Sometimes we’ve got to turn away. We shouldn’t beat ourselves up over it. We’re just being human. We’re not perfect. I’m sure there were times when even Mother Teresa was a bitch. You’re one of the most generous and giving people I know. Sure there’s always a little more that we can do. But don’t worry about it. You’re doing plenty and there will always be another chance tomorrow.”

Yesterday at work, I was contemplating these thoughts whilst adding onto my ever growing to do list, including pushing Kev’s email response to the top of the list. It was then I noticed the pigeons. It was then I made the decision. Rest, renewal, reflection and rejuvenation are shifting to the top of the to do list and everything else is just going to have to wait.

As much as it often frustrates me, I know that I’m wired for an active, giving and passionate life. I need to be involved in work that is engaging, challenging and motivating. I’m also beginning to think that time cannot be managed and that it is our energy that needs to be monitored and responded to if we are to live our full potential and not collapse of exhaustion from attempting to do everything on our to do list because we feel we have to. Hence my decision to focus on the 4 R’s.

Cultivating the four R’s into our lives is a vital process that allows us to do and appreciate all the bloody rippers each and every day. They allow us to enjoy the people around us, prepare us for the challenges that cross our path and support us when we embrace our next adventure. More importantly, they allow us to be ourselves.

How am I planning to do this?

Rest – not only does the body need rest with some serious zzzzzz’s, but the mind needs some heavy duty mindfulness and meditation. There are a couple of books waiting to be read, some music to be enjoyed and a little pocket of sand that has my name on it when the weather decides to turn on a little spring sunshine. The Sabbath doesn’t simply have to be on a Sunday. It can be ten minutes or ten hours of passiveness anytime. Are you willing to allow it into your life?

Renewal – I firmly believe that living a life without personal passions is tiring. Living with enthusiasm, with your DNA dancing and your mind, body and spirit alive, brings energy. It gives life. People ask why I take myself on a full day hike when I’m tired. Given that I was born to live an active life, it’s because I love it! It renews and restores me. It’s like my writing. I didn’t do it for so long because I couldn’t. Now I just want to do it all the time. It makes me feel good. Renewal is active. It’s what we love to do. It’s who we are. It gives us purpose. It makes us feel alive.

Reflection – It’s time to take a good, hard look at my life. Is it where I want it to be? Is it tiring me out not living that life? Do I need to adjust the way I do things? Not for others, but for myself? Am I getting frustrated and exhausted because I’m not being authentic?

Rejuvenation – There’s no difference between a pool of stagnant green water and some people’s lives. We need to have a constant flow of ideas, adjustments and experiences bringing colour and movement into our life. The alternative is a very sluggish and dormant way of living. It’s time to start creating before I begin to go green around the edges.

And so Big Kev, you’ll be very happy to know that my to do list priority is definitely the four R’s. It may seem strange there are a few active options included. However, I feel they are a critical part of the process as they encourage me to look after myself, be selfish, do what I love and focus on getting back to who I am. To be, is to be able to give. Thank you for the prod in the right direction. Even though you are thousands of kilometres away, you are definitely on my dinner party list if I had ten people in the world I had to choose from. Thank you for being my friend. xx

To everyone else, when is the last time you held up your T? Is it time to create the space you need? Can you let go of your worries, responsibilities, accountabilities, frustrations, expectations, check list, critiquing, evaluating and need to hurtle full speed. Are you ready to let go of time and perhaps consider managing your energy instead?

Find yourself some space in which to ruffle your feathers, settle yourself and just be content to not move very far at all, do a major service and tune up of where you’re life is at and provide yourself with a little indulgent time for you.

As Big Kev reminded me, “It’s those little periods of rest and self reward that help us recharge ourselves and begin the good fight anew.”

If you’re looking for me, I’ll be curled up with a book, lounging in a thermal pool, meditating under a tree, sucking in fresh air, having a massage, high on a hill, preparing for some interviews, making some changes and redirecting my energy to where it should be all the time – with myself.

The next fight is going to be a good one.

you bloody ripper!